Do you have it, the “drive” to sing? The internal programing that you did not choose for yourself, but was chosen for you.  Is it the ultimate experience for you, beyond anything.  Is this a good thing?  A blessing or a sentence? Can you not experience full joy without it?  Are you in pain to see others do it when you can not?

Are we addicts to this singing?  Sentenced to a life filled with highs and lows depending on if we have a gig or don’t, if they applaud us or they reject us?  Is anything more important than singing to you?  Can you live without it?  Does the desire for it hold you back from normal routine and happiness?

If you are one of these people:

Why are we like this?  How can we live the day to day like everyone else with the burden or blessing of the “drive “to sing?  How can we commit to a life other than one filled with our truest desire?

It is a hard line to walk.  The desire to sing is something that is only understood by someone else who shares your “drive”.  It sets you apart.  I am not always sure whether it is a good or bad thing.  It would be an easier life without this “drive”, but would you experience anything close to the high of singing without it?

I wonder if it is like a drug in a way; taking us to a place like nothing else can in our bodies.  When we are connected, the sound is resonating through us, and an audience is emerged in it, it is really like nothing else.  But, it does come with a price, and it does cause a lot of pain as well as joy.

I am not talking about the hobbyist singer.  Those people are blessed with a joy for something that they can have fun with, not something they can’t live without.  I am talking about the driven, born stuffed with talent, singer.  I know many of them.  I am one of them- have always been.  We all suffer through our craft at very high costs.  Very few of us ever hit a secure outlet for it and most of us are left wandering for the outlet at a loss, leaving most other pleasures waned for what they are.

I don’t know why we were chosen.  With talent comes responsibility.  The responsibility to share it with others who can only touch it through us.  There is a lot of drama that goes along with all of this.  Your task is to find a healthy balance in life. To find peace in the normal without the singing and extra pleasure with the singing.   Not necessary pleasure, but extra pleasure, there is a difference.

I know a lot of amazing singers who put everything else on hold such as marriage and families because they are all encompassed and “driven” to sing.  A lot of singers think they will do all those other things “after” they have reached a certain level of success through their singing.

My advice to you:  There are no guarantees of fame, fortune or even regular work as a singer, but there is the guarantee that life will go on whether you make it or not.  You will age every day, and time passes whether or not you can fill an auditorium, or amphitheater.

Find joy in life outside of singing. Find peace in yourself without singing success, or you may very well end up living a life full of painful angst.

Why so dark from a voice teacher who sells voice lesson CDs and books?  –I’ve just seen a lot and want to pass on all that I can to you singer hopefuls.  Not only do I want to help people better their voices in their singing pursuits, I want people (singers) to have a chance at happiness and fulfillment no matter what.  I’ve been “around the singing pursuit block” if you will, and have a lot to share with you.

It takes a lot to sing and be a singer.  You can not control your success.  You are not an aspiring lawyer who studies hard goes to school and then practices law.  Don’t base your complete worth on whether you get that lucky break someday.  By all means sing, work hard and go after it, but find out what else makes you happy and fill yourself with those things as well.

Sing well, and find balance.

Ariella Vaccarino creator of Voice Lessons To Go (singing lessons on CD), and author of Vocalize!

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